I’m anxious to tell you that I quit the #75Hard Challenge 12 days early.
So for me, it was the 63 Hard.
Why would I be anxious to tell you about my “defeat?”
Well, partly because I don’t really see it as a defeat.
I made a conscious choice not to continue.
But mostly because I want to let you know that when it comes to things health & wellness, I’m FAR from perfect.
You see, it’s come to my attention recently that some people feel self-conscious eating around me. My friend and business associate, Tyler recently admitted that she was uncomfortable sitting with me at a luncheon. Uncomfortable because she wondered if I was judging her because of the food on her plate or if she ate dessert.
And as I looked around at others, their smiles seems to acknowledge she wasn’t the only one!
Ugh! NO! I don’t judge you.
You make your choices and you live with the consequences of them.
Sometimes those consequences are health-enhancing. And sometimes, less so.
Besides, my family will readily tell you I’m a chocolate addict.
It only took me nearly 60 years to find the right balance between how much chocolate I eat, how much bicycling I do, and how much other fatty foods I eat.
That balance allows me to keep my weight in check and keep my blood chemistries where I want to see them.
But really, the point is that I can’t judge people. Whether they are friends, clients or even family.
If I do, they will never be able to be authentic with me. And that’s not the relationship I strive for with anyone. And certainly not the relationship I could have with a client.
And another thing: the family part of this equation has been the most difficult part to get to. Sometimes I still stumble here. The line between wanting to advocate for someone you love and judging them about their choice is a very fine line indeed.
The thing I’ve come to with this is that I want them to treat their bodies with love and care. By doing so, they are more likely to be able to continue to do all the things they want and have a body and mind that supports them.
AND I can’t judge them if they choose to do things I wouldn’t.
So I continue to answer my brother’s questions about his health issues. Even so, I know it’s unlikely that he’ll address the problem beyond symptomatic relief.
And I continue to not butt in where I’m not asked for advice with my kids; difficult though it may be.
And I continue to acknowledge my defeats and setbacks so that others feel comfortable if they “fail” according to their own terms, in my presence.
So eat that ice cream in front of me. I may care but as a mentor once taught me,
“I care but I don’t carry.” (Meaning I won’t care more than you about any aspect of your life.)
And I won’t judge you for it.
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